what i wouldn't give for photographic memory right now

board review isn't going as quickly, or as memorably (haha!) as i thought.

i'm glad that the boards force us to go back to the basics, things we've studied before, but forgot. :) things are easier to understand (but not necessarily remember, haha!) after seeing patients and prescribing meds.

ANG DAMI lang talaga. even if we were given six months to study all this, kulang pa rin. also, some of the things we read about for board review were never taken up while we were in med school. pero kung iisipin mo/the way it's talked about in review class, must know nga naman sila. haha! nakakaloka.

naku. pwede ba ang pagpasa ng boards ay based na lang sa effort rather than scores? haha! :D

why i love my boyfriend part 1

on eating A LOT:

"try stopping yourself. then when you succeed you realize you can control yourself.

that makes you more confident.

then you build on that,

and do more."

na-inspire niya ko. haha!

-hugs-

there has to be more to me than an appalling lack of eq and self-control. :)

review day one

haha! kapraningan day one din ang pwedeng title ng entry na ito.

we had some board simulation exam things in brains.

omg ang hirap.

we had:

1. biochem - may *pictures* yung mga process na ito. i've seen these terms in *pictures.* bottom line, hindi ko na sila maalala. MUST STUDY.

2. anatomy - 'nuff said. haha!

3. patho - basta, patho BRS na yan. haha!

nahirapan pa ko lalo with a tummy ache and SLEEPINESS. as in natutulugan ko yung exam. hindi ito pwede sa boards!

therefore, anong natutunan ko ngayong araw?

1. yung physio quota ko, at

2. MATULOG NG MAAGA.

also, i'm still not over having to move here to my lola's house for review. i spend five years wishing i could go home, and i still have to move out for the boards.

i don't like staying away from home (meaning away from my family), no matter how beautiful this house is. in fairness, my bed (as in the one i use in the cauliflower house) is here, and so are the helpers, pero iba pa rin. tapos wala pang mall dito. haha! at walang mabilis na 'net. magtyatyaga ulit ako sa sun broadband. booness.

days like these, gusto ko na talagang umuwi sa cauliflower house.

hayyyyy.

btw, vote kathy for fresident!

let the psychosis begin!

Okay, i've voted.

So it's time to get ready for the boards.

i have almost all the reviewers i need except for a few books i left in adriatico, one with donn mc, and one i have yet to order.

honestly, i'm in a state of panic right now. ang dami kong hindi alam, at ang dami ko nang nalimutan.

yung mga aaralin ko ba for these first weeks of review maaalala ko pa sa august?

so dahil wala akong alam, sayang ba yung effort ko ng limang taon?

makukumpleto ko ba reviewers ko?

papasa ba 'kong boards?

magiging NoyBi ba tayo for the next 6 years?

kakain ba ko ng dunkin donuts or krispy kreme after typing this entry?

fear and panic.

tinotopak na ko.

*cricket cricket*

blocked again. this is not good. i have to finish the frigging yearbook by tomorrow so that i can study for the boards in peace, but it's harder than i thought.

writing has got to be the one of the very few jobs where you can sit still and stare at your computer screen for hours on end and (legally, honestly) say you're working.

and i can't believe i gave my eic the link to this blog. haha!

let's hope she doesn't read this. ;)

Plan

a late entry. haha!

i started this blog in celebration of the end of med school and the beginning of the rest of my life.

Since the initial adjustment of starting medicine, I had an ever-lengthening list of things-I-used-to-do-but-can’t-anymore, things-I-want-to-do-but-can’t and things-my-non-med-friends-can-do-that-I-can’t, all because of med. I considered the five years of medical school as a period of suspended animation. What was foremost in my mind was that as soon as May 1, 2010 comes in, I get do each and every item on that list- with a vengeance!!!

But during these last days of internship- we all began to think about what we would do once internship ends. Some wanted to sleep, others wanted to go home, and still others had (horror of horrors!): NOTHING TO DO. A classmate also asked me what I was going to do after April 30. I answered: everything. Everything? What kind of an answer is that? What was I really going to do?

I thought I was going to play with my Wii, but I won’t. I thought I was going to have a TV series marathon the way I used to, but I won’t. I thought I was going to spend the day mall-hopping in the malls I used to love. I was in one of them the other weekend. The place underwent a massive renovation- I didn’t recognize it anymore.

Five years had gone by. Of course things won’t be the same. Of course I won’t be the same. Time did not stand still when I left home, and no matter what I may have thought, time did not stand still for me either. I find that I don’t want the same things anymore. UPCM and UP-PGH made their marks on me, five years’ worth of marks. The silly LUIII student who came in 2005 is coming out the (hopefully) sensible UPCM 2010 doctor who got to deliver a baby and stand by a patient as the time of death was called.

So what am I really going to do after April 30?

EVERYTHING.

I have the rest of my life before me; bring it on!